Lew's Website

Tawas Bay Michigan

Da U.P.

Da Story of Creation

In da beginning, dere was nuttin'

Da U.P.
On da FIRST day,
God created da U.P.

Second Day
On da SECOND day,
He created da partridge, da deer, da bear,
da fish and da ducks.

Third Day
On da THIRD day,
He said "Let dere be Yoopers to roam da Upper Peninsula":

Fourth Day
On da FOURTH day,
God created da udder world down below

Fifth Day
On da FIFTH day,
He said "Let dere be trolls to live in da udder world down below".

Sixth Day
On da SIXTH day,
He created da bridge so da trolls got a way to get to heaven.

Seventh Day
God saw it was good and so on da
SEVENTH day, He went huntin

Little Known U.P. Facts

A True Story

A man in Topeka, Kansas, decided to write a book about churches around the country. He started by flying to San Francisco, and started working east from there. Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs and making notes. He spotted a golden telephone on the vestibule wall and was intrigued with a sign which read "$10,000 a minute." Seeking out the pastor he asked about the phone. The pastor answered that this golden phone is, in fact, a direct line to Heaven and if he pays the price he can talk directly to God. The man thanked the pastor and continued on his way.

As he continued to visit churches in Seattle, Austin, St. Louis, Chicago, Milwaukee, and all around the United States, he found more phones, with the same sign, and got the same answer from each pastor.

Finally, he arrived in Paradise, Michigan. Upon entering a church in this small community in Michigan's Upper Peninsula, behold, he saw the usual golden telephone. But THIS time, the sign read "Calls: 25 cents".

Fascinated, he asked to talk to the pastor. "I have been in churches all across the country and in each church, I have found this golden telephone and have been told it is a direct line to Heaven and that I could talk to God, but, in the other churches the cost was $10,000 a minute. Your sign reads 25 cents a call. Why?"

The pastor, smiling, replied, "Son, you're in da U.P. now. This is God's country...it's a local call."

Da Yoopers


Soooo.... now you probably want to get some real Yooper stuff!! Go to www.dayoopers.com and visit Da Tourist Trap Web Store.